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Mister Bottom Pain Being sung about E.B. Nelson to the Kander & Ebb tune "Mister Cellophane" from "Chicago" (Cellophane, Mister Cellophane should have been my name) If Ben could prove he's from a state inclined to overpopulate, The stance he's taken might make sense to Aetna. But since that's something he can't know, or at his age begin to show, Ben's goal's of little consequence to Aetna. Bottom pain, Mister Bottom Pain, goes against the grain. For Mister Bottom Pain is a snake in the grass – just a pain in the ass – And barely worth carfare to The Aetna. Bottom pain, Ben's a bottom pain. Who said no pain, no gain? Mister Bottom Pain earned himself a one-way pass to the cornfields of Nebraska. We may forget he's there, but will Aetna? Each Democratic Senator has veto power to kill the bill The question now is will E.B. kill more Nebraskans who are ill? Or will Aetna? Nelson says he'll vote against it if something new's not to his liking. But, being only one of sixty, his threat is not uniquely striking. Bottom pain, Mister Bottom Pain says he hates the others who Now insist if Bottom Pain, as part of Palin's next campaign, ever were to strike again, He'd need to watch his own kazoo, not Palin's or The Aetna's.
Music by John Kander To 'Politicians for Sale' To 'The New Perils of Pauline' |